Right At Home! The Ever Eternal Marie Antoinette Stages A Comeback On Capitol Hill

Antoinette toasts to Wilbur Ross at the House Oversight Committee hearing.

“My fabulosity and philosophy are eternal!”

By Marie Antoinette
Inequality.org (3/14/19)

She’s back — in all her out-of-touch glory.

More than 225 years after losing her head to a guillotine, Marie Antoinette has made a grand re-entrance into the halls of power.

With her reattached head holding up a frothy mound of white curls, she descended on Capitol Hill on March 14 to attend a House Oversight Committee hearing. The star witness: billionaire Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross.

Ross is just one of numerous Trump administration officials who’ve distinguished themselves with statements so cluelessly elitist as to make comparisons with the French Queen unavoidable.

Inequality.org co-editor Sarah Anderson caught up with the 18th century icon of indulgence to get her views on her fellow plutocrats of today.

What brings you to Capitol Hill, your majesty?

To meet Monsieur Wilbur Ross, of course! I have heard that the Commerce Secretary said during the shutdown that he didn’t understand why government employees would go to homeless shelters for food when they could simply take out loans — how ME of him! “Let them take out loans” is the new #LetThemEatCake! I felt I must meet this man who clearly draws so much inspiration from me.

Did you ever dream you’d be so relevant to the political scene more than two centuries after your death?

Absolument, mon cheri! I am, after all, Marie Antoinette. My fabulosity and philosophy are eternal.

What lessons would you like to impart to today’s clueless plutocrats?

They must be a little less brazen in the pillaging of public wealth. I mean, they can still be VERY wealthy AND keep their heads.

With what member of today’s richest 0.1% do you most identify?

I really quite adore Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin’s fabulous wife, Louise Linton. Those long black leather gloves she wore to grub the sheets of money at the Bureau of Engraving and Printing were PERFECTION.

I see you’re quite stylishly decked out yourself in a rouge-colored gown, and I’m impressed you were able to get into an elevator with a skirt that wide. Other than Linton, how would you rate the fashions here in the corridors of power in Washington in 2019?

Terrible! So drab! Where are the sky-high hairdos? The pastel colors and big gems? I haven’t seen a single lady wearing a hoop skirt. It’s a travesty, really.

(When she’s not eating cake on Capitol Hill, Marie Antoinette works as the Executive Director of American Family Voices under the name Lauren Windsor. Follow her@lawindsor.)

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